Nearing the End

Eighteen lessons.

I can scarcely believe Kris and I have only eighteen lessons left. Whenever I draw close to a major event in my life, time seems to move at warp speed. These last days in our school year together are flying by.

For the last seven years Kris has been educated in a homeschool of one. When Betsy was an eighth grader Kris was a first grader. Since Betsy went to high school and then on to college Kris and I have been on our own during the day. We have our routine of getting up, studying and going over work together down pat. We have been doing it for so long that it feels almost automatic. I think this contributes to the sensation that the days are going by so quickly.

I am coming around the last corner and I can definitely see the finish line. Why do I want to slow it down to a jog instead of pushing full steam ahead to the end?

Deep down I am not ready for this to be over. I have been teaching kids at home for most of my adult life. It will be difficult to get to the last pages of our books this time. No more learning adventures of this kind await me next year. I do not need to dream up new ways to tweak our schedule or find ways to keep my kids engaged.

All at once it will stop. Like stepping off a long and sometimes frightening roller coaster ride, my hair will be blown back from my face and I will be checking the park map to see what thrilling thing comes next.

I guess I am a little worried that no thrilling thing will come next.

I meant to be more reflective this year. I hoped to do some serious thinking about what my life will look like when I no longer wear the homeschooling mom t-shirt.

I just didn’t do it.

I got completely wrapped up in the “right here and right now” whirlwind school year this has been. I have been in survival mode or healing mode most of the time. It has been completely distracting.

I guess I had better get with it! My goal is to savor the next few weeks a bit, to put the brakes on (at least in my head!) and enjoy the time I have left to study with Kris.

I will begin by counting all of the blessings of this crazy year and practicing being grateful for all I have been able to accomplish with each one of my kids.

Surely there are adventures left to be had. I’m just going to have to get a new t-shirt!